aaj ek week se upar ho gaya hain aur barish abhi tak nahin ruki hain. aur aj phir preeti ka phone aaya tha aur hamesha ki tarah usne kaha ki vo mujhse milne ke liye aa rahi hain, main ab usse nahin milna chahta par pata nahin vo baar baar kyun milna chahti hain, esliye main usse milne usi restraunt mein gaya jahan ham aksar mila karte the…….:0
jab main vanha paucha to preeti vanha mera wait kar rahi thi…barish itni tej ho rahi thi ki vo kafi bhig bhi chuki thi jiske karan shayad usko thand bhi lag rahi thi….
main jakar preeti se kaha bhi ki vo baar baar mujhse kyun milne aati hain …main ab usse nahin milna chahta……aur phir preeti ne kaha …” I was Missing You Rahul….and i ignored that..
maine usse kaha ki main usko uske ghar chhod deta hun…..!! uske pass apna umbrella tha par shayad vo usko kholna nahin chahti thi aur mere umbrella mein mere saath chalne lagi…..thoda aage chalne par usne kaha ki usko kafi tej bhookh lagi hain kyunki usne subah se kuchh nahin khaya tha..par mera man nahin tha ki main uske saath kahin baith kar kuchh kha lun isliye maine usko mana kar diya…
preeti ne mujhse kaha ki main usko metro station mein chhod dun. vo vahan se metro par apne ghar chali jayegi..
aur jab ham metro statiom pahuche to vaha kafi bhid thi, barish itni tej thi ki kafi log train se hi apne ghar ja rahe the, jiske karan sari train full hokar aa aur jaa rahi thi aur ham donon vahan train ka wait kar rahe the…preeti meri taraf baar baar dekh rahi jaise kuchh kahna chahti ho par kahne ki himmat nahin ho rahi thi…ham donon ne kafi samay saath mein bitaya hai to main bhi samajh raha tha ki how she was feeling…….preeti ki vo masumiyat dekh mujhe bhi bahut bura lag raha tha…..
“mujhe yaad hai vo din jab mujhe preeti se pyar hua tha, hum 4 friends ek hi apartment mein rahte the, aur kafi mauj masti bhi karte the, saath mein khana khate , movies dekhte aur baten karte ek family ki tarah…aur in sab ke beech mujhe preeti se pyar ho gaya aur kuchh hi dino mein ham donon ek dusre se kafi pyar karne lage…college pura hone par vo apne ghar vapas chali gayi…par main phir bhi kabhi kabhi usse milne uske ghar jata rahta tha….”
Khair hamko metro station mein train ka wait karte karte kafi der ho gayi thi to maine preeti se dusre metro station mein chalne ko kaha aur hum donon vahan se nikal gaye, vo abhi bhi baar baar meri taraf dekh rahi thi…shayad vo mere baare mein hi soch rahi thi…
ham chal hi rahe the ki vo park aaya jismein ham donon kai bar jaya karte the, preeti ne mujhse kaha ki kya hum aaj akhiri baar dubara us park mein chal sakte hain, maine gusse mein uske saath chala gaya , park mein pahunchkar preeti vo tree dhundne lagi jismein ham donon ne likha tha “Rahul Loves Preeti”….
preeti rote hue mere pass aayi aur kaha ki vo tree kisi ne kaat diya hai, ye sunte hi mera dil bhi rone laga , mujhe bahut dukh ho raha tha yah sunke par maine preeti ko is bat ka ehsaas nahin hone diya aur usse vahan se chalne ke liye kaha….
preeti mujhse kuchh kahna chahti thi aur usne koshish bhi ki.. usne kaha ‘Rahul mujhe pata hain ki maine tumko kafi hurt kiya hai and i m sorry for that….kya ham dubara pahle jaise nahin rah sakte ..???
maine us bat ko ignore kar diya aur usko kuchh reply nahin diya …..” kahta bhi kiya 4 saal pahle mujhe doctor ne batya tha ki mujhe cancer ka problem ho raha hai par abhi ‘intial stage’ mein hai to cure ho jayega par maine doctor ki bat ko ignore kar diya aur kabhi dubara us doctor ke pass nahin gaya par abhi kuchh mahine pahle ek din mujhe kafi tej stomach mein pain hua to mujhe doctor ke pass jaana pada aur doctor ne vo kaha jo main kabhi nahin sunna chahta tha …doctor ne kaha ki aapka cancer final stage mein aa chuka hain “and you are almost at the end part of your life ”
mere kuchh samaj nahin aa raha tha ki ab main kya karun…kabhi man karta ki suicide kar lun par phir main nahin chahta tha ki meri family aur mere dost mere liye pareshan ho…especially ‘preeti… the person I love the most in this whole world. jisko abhi tak es baare mein kuchh bhi maloom nahin tha aur naa hi main usko kuchh batana chahta tha, isiliye maine usse juth kah diya ki main usse break-up karna chahta hun kyunki main kisi aur ladki ko pasand karta hun, mujhe bhi bahut bura lag raha tha par 3 saal ka pyar ko end karne ka aur koi option bhi to nahin tha…..
Khair ham donon train se uske stop mein pauche jahan maine ek auto wale ko preeti ko uske ghar chodne ke liye kaha….main bhi andar se ro raha tha, main preeti se kabhi bhi alag nahin hona chahta tha because i love her very much par kisi tarah maine apne aasun roke aur usko auto mein bithya aur aakhiri baar “take care bye ” kaha…
vo abhi bhi kuchh kahna chahti thi par maine naa chate hue bhi usko igonre kar diya aur usko jaane ke liye kaha aur finally us barish wale din ke baad ham kabhi nahin mile aur shayad kabhi nahin milenge….but i always have a true love for her and always will…”i love you preeti”
tumhen sad dekh kar main bhi ro raha tha par barish ke pani ke saath shayad mere aansu ka pata nahi chal raha tha , main bhi utna hi sad tha jitni ki tum , maine bhi tumko kabhi khona nahin chahta tha, maine bhi tumse vo sab baten karna chahta tha jo tum kahna chahti thi par shayad nahin kah paya ….I will always love you preeti…….!! RAHUL
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aaj ek saal baad jab mujhe Rahul ki yah diary mili to mujhe pata chala ki how much Rahul loved me…rahul jo ab is duniya se ja chuka hai aur main preeti jo aaj rahul ki diary pad rahi hun aur uske bina akeli mahsoos kar rahi hun……I love you too rahul
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